When I first came to Manila to study college, I was a naive skinny guy. I was 5'7.5 or so and weighed less than a 110 pounds (with clothes on!). My idea of eating out is eating in Jollibee or McDonalds and watching movies in theaters is a rare treat.
I had a little difficulty in adjusting to the faster pace of life in the city. I had what they called culture shock. Still a loner during my freshman year, I feel conscious when walking along the aisles and halls of UP, thinking everybody is looking at me. I was geniunely shocked to have seen two gays kissed in front of me (well, more of life lips to lips smack which I guess was their beso beso).
I almost cried studying for Math 17. Having learned nothing more than elementary algebra in high school (the pace of my studies in high school was really dragged down by my slower learning or preferring-to-do-other-things-than-study classmates).
I almost dropped out of ROTC and my knees shook every Monday (and sometimes Wednesday) that I have to go to UP to attend the ROTC trainings.
I had very little money back then. Generally living on a monthly allowance of less than P1,500 (including budget for transportation, meals and school projects). I survived on coffee in the morning, coffee or some other drink and perhaps some snacks for the whole day, and a heavy dinner. No wonder I weighed so little.
During free time, I roamed the dusty heart of Quezon City (Cubao) and was a regular visitor at Booksale stores in Cubao.
My clothes back then comprise mainly of t-shirts, checkered and plaid-ish polos and jeans.
I bought the shirt and jeans in Melvin's or its affiliate stores 'cause that's where they were cheap. I used a shirt that my sister-in-law gave to me back in high school for more than 8 years and would have used it longer had my mother not taken it. I felt really really good on being able to buy the P325 paid of walking shoes that was really comfortable.
I splurged on a double cassette recording of Les Miserables, which cost me about P250.
Life was not then easy then but I survived.
* * * * *
It's been almost ten years since then.
I am now weighing about 160 pounds.
I generally don't like eating in Jollibee, McDonalds or other fastfood stores. My idea of eating out is at Italianni's or Fish & Co. or some other restaurants in the Greenbelt area.
I can watch movies in theathers whenever I want.
I have adjusted to the fast pace of city life and cannot bear of the thought of living again in the province. Walking wherever, whenever no longer gives me the creeps. Guys kissing no longer shocks me. Been there, done that. In fact, I think very few things now can shock me.
I have forgotten most of algebra and trigonometry and calculus is now like the walking shoe I so dearly loved - probably unusable and discarded.
I am now earning more than the average person my age earns. Hell, I am earning more than the average person twice my age earns. Food is no longer a preoccupation and I can eat whereever I want, whenever I want.
I find it icky and jologs going to Cubao and my favorite haunts is now Glorietta and Greenbelt.
Now, I have a closetful full of clothes. Some of which I have never even worn. There was a time just last year when I did shoe-shopping on a weekly basis since I was bored. Just last month, I bought three pair of shoes from the mall.
Cassette tapes are no longer in and I regularly buy DVDs for my collection. Spending about a thousand bucks for DVDs in one week is no longer a treat.
Life is in many ways easier now but I'm still not completely satisfied.
* * * * *
Life was simpler then.
Life is more complicated now.
I couldn't buy things then.
Now, I want to buy things I can't afford.
There were times when I was really depressed then.
These times still come now.
Some things change.
Some things . . . well, they're just reincarnate themselves in a more complicated guise.
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Sort of New Developments and Other Rantings
It's been quite sometime since last time I blogged. There have been some new developments and some not so new developments.
* * * * *
I wrote in my blog on sex and the city how I was like the girls of Manhattan: looking for a job, looking for an apartment and looking for a boyfriend (hihihi).
Ok. I have found an apartment and been living there for more than 2 months, found a new job and am starting on April 16, and I have a sort of someone whom I am seeing every now and then. Not really the ideal apartment, job or bf but these will do for now.
* * * * *
I went to Kitchen last night and ate there. . . after a long time. Feels like it was ages since I last had a meal there.
Then I went to Powerbooks to look at some books. Also feels like ages since I was there. I found a bought, Film: A Critical Approach, or something like that. And it cost P2,459, quite expensive. But I went on and bought it. It's been quite sometime since I splurged on something.
It was an informative book. And contained a lot of what I wanted to know. For instance, there is a section detailing the four general writing on films: scene analysis - which analyzes a particular scene of a movie in relation to the whole movie and its theme, film analysis - which analyzes the scenes and details of the movie in relation to its theme, research paper - which is the most tedious type of film paper to write, and the movie review - the type for general audiences, much like the film review of Jessica Zafra and Roger Ebert.
* * * * *
ABS - CBN is re-airing Marina - that fantaserye starring Claudine Barreto as the mermaid. Hmmm, an obvious move to undermine the Dyesebel fantaserye that will star Marian Rivera. Tsk tsk tsk!
* * * * *
* * * * *
I wrote in my blog on sex and the city how I was like the girls of Manhattan: looking for a job, looking for an apartment and looking for a boyfriend (hihihi).
Ok. I have found an apartment and been living there for more than 2 months, found a new job and am starting on April 16, and I have a sort of someone whom I am seeing every now and then. Not really the ideal apartment, job or bf but these will do for now.
* * * * *
I went to Kitchen last night and ate there. . . after a long time. Feels like it was ages since I last had a meal there.
Then I went to Powerbooks to look at some books. Also feels like ages since I was there. I found a bought, Film: A Critical Approach, or something like that. And it cost P2,459, quite expensive. But I went on and bought it. It's been quite sometime since I splurged on something.
It was an informative book. And contained a lot of what I wanted to know. For instance, there is a section detailing the four general writing on films: scene analysis - which analyzes a particular scene of a movie in relation to the whole movie and its theme, film analysis - which analyzes the scenes and details of the movie in relation to its theme, research paper - which is the most tedious type of film paper to write, and the movie review - the type for general audiences, much like the film review of Jessica Zafra and Roger Ebert.
* * * * *
ABS - CBN is re-airing Marina - that fantaserye starring Claudine Barreto as the mermaid. Hmmm, an obvious move to undermine the Dyesebel fantaserye that will star Marian Rivera. Tsk tsk tsk!
* * * * *
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
Sex and the City
Carrie Bradshaw once said that New York women (particularly in Manhattan) are always looking for something.
Looking for an apartment.
Looking for a job.
Looking for a boyfriend.
At the time that I watched it, I couldn't relate. Having a good and fun job and a nice apartment at that time. And not really caring to have a boyfriend. Hihihi.
But now I feel like I am living in Carrie's Manhattan, which for my sake I will call my MANhattan.
I am looking for an apartment.
I am looking for a new job.
And possibly looking for a boy-friend. Or just simply boyfriend. Hihihi.
Oh, Carrie Bradshaw, with your US$400,000 collection of designer shoes, fashionable clothes with large flowers. I never thought I'd be able to relate to what you were saying.
And now that I can, where are you? Your show ended with a bang. Unmindful of the fact that sometime in the future after your show has ended, I can finally relate to your endless prattles and blah-blah on life, relationships and sex in the city.
Looking for an apartment.
Looking for a job.
Looking for a boyfriend.
At the time that I watched it, I couldn't relate. Having a good and fun job and a nice apartment at that time. And not really caring to have a boyfriend. Hihihi.
But now I feel like I am living in Carrie's Manhattan, which for my sake I will call my MANhattan.
I am looking for an apartment.
I am looking for a new job.
And possibly looking for a boy-friend. Or just simply boyfriend. Hihihi.
Oh, Carrie Bradshaw, with your US$400,000 collection of designer shoes, fashionable clothes with large flowers. I never thought I'd be able to relate to what you were saying.
And now that I can, where are you? Your show ended with a bang. Unmindful of the fact that sometime in the future after your show has ended, I can finally relate to your endless prattles and blah-blah on life, relationships and sex in the city.
Unfinished Blogs
Today, I clicked the 'edit posts' tab in this website and noted that I have so many unfinished blogs.
I start an idea, some of which are good, while others are mediocre. But somehow I can't sustain the effort to finish what I started.
It's like Richard Brown in The Hours saying that he is a failure as a writer because he has some good ideas, things that he wants to write, but somehow, it all ends up so much less.
Maybe I'll just follow what Lea Salonga sings about - Finish What You ............
I start an idea, some of which are good, while others are mediocre. But somehow I can't sustain the effort to finish what I started.
It's like Richard Brown in The Hours saying that he is a failure as a writer because he has some good ideas, things that he wants to write, but somehow, it all ends up so much less.
Maybe I'll just follow what Lea Salonga sings about - Finish What You ............
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
On Buying Clothes
Last Saturday, I went to Makati Cinema Square with a friend to buy some DVDs. When we were there, we went to Plaza Fair's department store to look at clothes and shoes.
When looking at the clothes and shirts, my mind immediately assumes that my size is medium. I have forgotten that about the time the Philippines transitioned to Philippine Financial Reporting Standards (PFRS) from the old generally accepted accounting principles (GAAP), i myself have transitioned from being size medium to size large. Like most Philippine companies finding it difficult to accept that the simple GAAP has now become complicated, I found it hard and still finds it hard to accept that the medium shirt I used to buy are, in most cases, no longer acceptable. Wearing them makes me look like a suman wrapped in coconut leaves and bulging in the wrong places. I stick out from the crowd in the same way that an FS today prepared using the old GAAP will be looked at in a not-so-favorable way.
And for me, wearing large sized shirts has somehow become a standard, not just generally accepted, except in certain cases.
When looking at the clothes and shirts, my mind immediately assumes that my size is medium. I have forgotten that about the time the Philippines transitioned to Philippine Financial Reporting Standards (PFRS) from the old generally accepted accounting principles (GAAP), i myself have transitioned from being size medium to size large. Like most Philippine companies finding it difficult to accept that the simple GAAP has now become complicated, I found it hard and still finds it hard to accept that the medium shirt I used to buy are, in most cases, no longer acceptable. Wearing them makes me look like a suman wrapped in coconut leaves and bulging in the wrong places. I stick out from the crowd in the same way that an FS today prepared using the old GAAP will be looked at in a not-so-favorable way.
And for me, wearing large sized shirts has somehow become a standard, not just generally accepted, except in certain cases.
Friday, January 4, 2008
The Man and the Sea
In a village somewhere near the jungle, there lived a group of people who work away from their homes. Some of them work in or near the the sea as fishermen while the others spend practically all of their time in the desert and jungle. At one time during this gathering, the village elders summoned all village people of age to teach them an important lesson that they will have to learn in order to survive life. In this gathering, the village elders taught the people the basic mechanics of and the problems that may be encountered when swimming.
The fishermen nodded in understanding and asked questions on what the elders taught. Some too eagerly. The other half, who spend their days working their whole lives in the desert and the jungle, can barely comprehend what the elders were saying. Some were able to understand the basic mechanics of swimming - that you need to move your arms and legs in order to float and that you need to breath once in while. Others, lacking the experience (some of them haven't even seen what the sea looks like), were at a total loss.
One of the non-fisherman people, Aethel, is planning to move to a different village to become a fisherman and is trying as hard as he could to understand what the hell the village elders were talking about. He is not sure whether his plans will come to fruition but just in case, just in case it comes true, he will need to learn all that he could about swimming. At the start of his working life, he wanted to be a fisherman. But the village elders, in all their knowledge or folly, assigned him the task of planting crops, hunting, gathering and all the other odd work that the elders decide from time to time, including an assignment to build a boat for the fishermen. In short, he became the jack of most trades but the master of nothing.
At the end of the village gathering, the non-fishermen folks went to their homes, shaking their heads in confusion. For most of them, this gathering has just been a waste of time. They learned nothing that they could use in their daily work and home life. It doesn't matter. They will soon forget that this gathering ever happened. The next day, they would resume their work as they have always done for most of their lives.
However, for Aethel, this gathering is a lost opportunity for learning. Try as he could to learn, he has had no experience to fully comprehend and learn the knowledge that the village elders imparted. He went home, sighed, and hoped that when the time comes, he can apply to working in the sea what he learned from his years of working the land.
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Another Saturday morning and I have to attend a training on derivatives and embedded derivatives. Not that I don't know anything about these things, I once worked on an engagement where we supposedly identified embedded derivatives from the client's purchase and other contracts.
But when I got to the training, I could not comprehend what the partner and the manager was saying. Majority of the topics discussed relates to derivatives and embedded derivatives applicable to banks and financial institutions. Sure I was able to learn some of the basic concepts. But, having no experience in banking, I failed to see or appreciate this nor can I see the benefits of these knowledge in my immediate future.
When I entered auditing, I wanted to be assigned to the banking group but I was assigned to the manufacturing, real estate, construction, retailing, and others group. Not that I didn't enjoy working in this industries, but I feel that I just haven't mastered any industry at all.
And now I am planning to work abroard, where most of the jobs available are in the line of banks and financial institutions. Tsk tsk tsk. Poor me. Maybe I'll just learn auditing financial institutions when I get there. After all, I'm a fast learner and fast worker (or so some of my managers believe).
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The training is over. Nothing has changed. Nothing new mastered.
I am sitting here in our office typing this blog.
Looking back on the good times.
Being depressed on the present.
Hoping for the best in the future.
The fishermen nodded in understanding and asked questions on what the elders taught. Some too eagerly. The other half, who spend their days working their whole lives in the desert and the jungle, can barely comprehend what the elders were saying. Some were able to understand the basic mechanics of swimming - that you need to move your arms and legs in order to float and that you need to breath once in while. Others, lacking the experience (some of them haven't even seen what the sea looks like), were at a total loss.
One of the non-fisherman people, Aethel, is planning to move to a different village to become a fisherman and is trying as hard as he could to understand what the hell the village elders were talking about. He is not sure whether his plans will come to fruition but just in case, just in case it comes true, he will need to learn all that he could about swimming. At the start of his working life, he wanted to be a fisherman. But the village elders, in all their knowledge or folly, assigned him the task of planting crops, hunting, gathering and all the other odd work that the elders decide from time to time, including an assignment to build a boat for the fishermen. In short, he became the jack of most trades but the master of nothing.
At the end of the village gathering, the non-fishermen folks went to their homes, shaking their heads in confusion. For most of them, this gathering has just been a waste of time. They learned nothing that they could use in their daily work and home life. It doesn't matter. They will soon forget that this gathering ever happened. The next day, they would resume their work as they have always done for most of their lives.
However, for Aethel, this gathering is a lost opportunity for learning. Try as he could to learn, he has had no experience to fully comprehend and learn the knowledge that the village elders imparted. He went home, sighed, and hoped that when the time comes, he can apply to working in the sea what he learned from his years of working the land.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Another Saturday morning and I have to attend a training on derivatives and embedded derivatives. Not that I don't know anything about these things, I once worked on an engagement where we supposedly identified embedded derivatives from the client's purchase and other contracts.
But when I got to the training, I could not comprehend what the partner and the manager was saying. Majority of the topics discussed relates to derivatives and embedded derivatives applicable to banks and financial institutions. Sure I was able to learn some of the basic concepts. But, having no experience in banking, I failed to see or appreciate this nor can I see the benefits of these knowledge in my immediate future.
When I entered auditing, I wanted to be assigned to the banking group but I was assigned to the manufacturing, real estate, construction, retailing, and others group. Not that I didn't enjoy working in this industries, but I feel that I just haven't mastered any industry at all.
And now I am planning to work abroard, where most of the jobs available are in the line of banks and financial institutions. Tsk tsk tsk. Poor me. Maybe I'll just learn auditing financial institutions when I get there. After all, I'm a fast learner and fast worker (or so some of my managers believe).
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The training is over. Nothing has changed. Nothing new mastered.
I am sitting here in our office typing this blog.
Looking back on the good times.
Being depressed on the present.
Hoping for the best in the future.
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
Not so Happy New Year
Another year. Another suitcase in another hall.
Well, not really. It's another year but I'm not yet in another hall (or workplace, that is).
I'm still slaving away here in my old old old work. Doing the same thing. Or supposed to be doing the same things (plus a little bit more) but not finding the drive or willingness to do these same things.
I need to have change in my life. It's time for a cool change. I know that it's time for a cool change.
New year. But nothing much is new with my life.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Last December 30, our whole family (plus some) went to Manila from our hometown. My brother, father, mother, nephew and I riding in my brother's new car (which, hopefully will become mine when he leaves) and my sister, sister-in-law, two nephews, niece, my sister-in-law's brother and sister, their house helper and my cousin's granddaughter riding in the Fortuner.
The Fortuner (which my sister drove) swerved in the highway twice and hit a roadside metal fence. My sister-in-law was rattled. But no harm done, except for damage on the front (near the bumper) in the passenger seat side and the door to the passenger side was blocked and cannot be opened.
We spent the new year in Luneta (near the grandstand) waiting for the grand fireworks which never came.
I went home after the celebration to my apartment in Makati.
On New Year's Day, I went to Quiapo to buy some DVDs but most of the stores were closed. I did, however, manage to buy some DVD boxes.
I no longer joined my family on their trip to Mall of Asia.
My father and mother went to my apartment after the malling and brought me some not-so-good food from the grille where they ate.
Upon entering the door, my mother said that the Fortuner had an accident again. This time hitting (or being hit) an owner-type jeepney. The damage, they say, is on the front of the driver's side. The Fortuner now has damage and scratches on the left and right front sides.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I almost didn't go to work since I didn't want to see my managers. I still have a lot of backlogs to do.
Despite all misgivings, I did manage to go to work. And what do you know? They're still on vacation leave.
I managed to get some work done.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
So far that is how my new year goes.
To all those who are having a better start for the year:
Have a happy and prosperous new year!
To people like me whose start of the year could get better:
Let's accept what's happening and hope that the year turns out for the better.
Well, not really. It's another year but I'm not yet in another hall (or workplace, that is).
I'm still slaving away here in my old old old work. Doing the same thing. Or supposed to be doing the same things (plus a little bit more) but not finding the drive or willingness to do these same things.
I need to have change in my life. It's time for a cool change. I know that it's time for a cool change.
New year. But nothing much is new with my life.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Last December 30, our whole family (plus some) went to Manila from our hometown. My brother, father, mother, nephew and I riding in my brother's new car (which, hopefully will become mine when he leaves) and my sister, sister-in-law, two nephews, niece, my sister-in-law's brother and sister, their house helper and my cousin's granddaughter riding in the Fortuner.
The Fortuner (which my sister drove) swerved in the highway twice and hit a roadside metal fence. My sister-in-law was rattled. But no harm done, except for damage on the front (near the bumper) in the passenger seat side and the door to the passenger side was blocked and cannot be opened.
We spent the new year in Luneta (near the grandstand) waiting for the grand fireworks which never came.
I went home after the celebration to my apartment in Makati.
On New Year's Day, I went to Quiapo to buy some DVDs but most of the stores were closed. I did, however, manage to buy some DVD boxes.
I no longer joined my family on their trip to Mall of Asia.
My father and mother went to my apartment after the malling and brought me some not-so-good food from the grille where they ate.
Upon entering the door, my mother said that the Fortuner had an accident again. This time hitting (or being hit) an owner-type jeepney. The damage, they say, is on the front of the driver's side. The Fortuner now has damage and scratches on the left and right front sides.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I almost didn't go to work since I didn't want to see my managers. I still have a lot of backlogs to do.
Despite all misgivings, I did manage to go to work. And what do you know? They're still on vacation leave.
I managed to get some work done.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
So far that is how my new year goes.
To all those who are having a better start for the year:
Have a happy and prosperous new year!
To people like me whose start of the year could get better:
Let's accept what's happening and hope that the year turns out for the better.
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